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Chapter

Your Majesty is Poisonous – Chapter 30

by Little Panda — The Empress Dowager is So Wicked When the men sent to Zai County to investigate returned to the palace to report, Wan Bi was still at her evening meal. She had seen how heartily Yao Xi ate earlier, and it had made her eat an extra portion herself. Yao Xi was brewing tea nearby. She had just declared that she would serve Her Majesty the Empress Dowager in front of the saddle and behind the horse,Original: ānqiánmǎhòu (鞍前马后). An idiom meaning to wait on someone hand and foot, following them…
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Your Majesty is Poisonous – Chapter 3

by Little Panda — The Terrifying Empress Dowager Yao Xi froze on the spot as if hit by a freezing spell, unable to move an inch. Zheng Dayun, kowtowing on the ground, and the piercing gaze on her back told her everything she needed to know. Here, a song for my soon-to-be-prematurely-departed self: “Cooled.”“Cooled” (凉凉, liáng liáng) is the title of a popular Chinese song. The title has become internet slang for when something is over, hopeless, or doomed. To be honest, she wasn’t the type to speak…
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Your Majesty is Poisonous – Chapter 29

by Little Panda — The Empress Dowager is So Wicked Perhaps it wasn't that the Empress Dowager lacked self-awareness, but that to her, the palace maids and eunuchs of Ning'an Palace were just little white miceOriginal: xiǎo báishǔ. The Chinese equivalent of 'guinea pigs,' used for expendable test subjects. whose deaths she wouldn't even find regrettable. Dish after dish was brought up from the small kitchen, and Yao Xi waited by the table with a pained expression. Logically, poisoning was a low-probability event, so…
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Chapter

Your Majesty is Poisonous – Chapter 28

by Little Panda — The Empress Dowager is So Wicked If not for the scarcity of resources in the Cold Palace and the inner court’s ban on making a racket, the residents would have hung up lanterns and streamers, beaten gongs and drums, and celebrated Beauty Yu’s arrival with all the fanfare they could muster. “Did you hear? That Yu-shi has been sent here.” “Which Yu-shi?” “The one who holds her chin so high she looks at the sky instead of the road.” “Well, they do say no flower stays red for a…
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Your Majesty is Poisonous – Chapter 27

by Little Panda — The Empress Dowager is So Wicked The Empress Dowager forbade Yao Xi from leaving the hall, so she graciously permitted her to use the lavatory that had been converted from an ear-room in a side hall. It was normally a place for the night-duty palace maids to take care of their internal needs. Since it was inside the main palace building, Yao Xi was the first eunuch to ever relieve herself there. Yao Xi felt not a shred of honor in achieving this particular first. With a pained expression, she walked…
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Your Majesty is Poisonous – Chapter 26

by Little Panda — The Empress Dowager is So Wicked Wan Bi saw all of Yao Xi’s panic and helplessness. The little castrated donkey has a guilty conscience, she thought. If his conscience were clear, why would he be so flustered? It was a real pity, she mused. She had grown quite fond of this little castrated donkey. Not only was he good-looking, but he could be both deathly timid and fiercely spirited. Keeping him around for her amusement was rather fun. If the little castrated donkey had simply been too careless and…
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Your Majesty is Poisonous – Chapter 25

by Little Panda — The Empress Dowager is So Wicked Beauty Yu had no intention of moving out of Yixiu Palace. After being caned, she was helped back to Yixiu Palace. Logically, she should have obeyed Her Majesty the Empress Dowager’s decree and immediately packed her things to leave. She did not. She had someone summon Emperor Ming Cheng. Without changing her clothes or applying medicine, she lay sprawled on the bed, smeared with blood, playing the victim. Emperor Ming Cheng fell for it completely. When he…
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Your Majesty is Poisonous – Chapter 24

by Little Panda — The Empress Dowager is So Wicked Yao Xi saw the Empress Dowager and the others enter the Warm Pavilion. Seizing the moment while no one was around, she quickly twisted her body. Her chest was killing her. She had put on the binding yesterday around noon when she woke up, but her breasts felt like they were being inflated, growing larger and larger. Afraid of being discovered, she could only bind them tighter and tighter. After the commotion with Liao Bing last night, she hadn't had a single chance to…
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Your Majesty is Poisonous – Chapter 23

by Little Panda — The Empress Dowager is So Wicked Meng Delai was busy with official business when he looked up and saw Liufu arrive. "Is the matter I assigned you settled?" he asked faintly. He had given Liufu some instructions a few days prior and assumed he was here to report on their completion. "Reporting to the Director of the Depot, this little one has come to ask for your guidance. The boy who entered the palace to replace Yao Xian went to Ning'an Palace early this morning…" Liufu's voice was full of…
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Chapter

Your Majesty is Poisonous – Chapter 22

by Little Panda — The Empress Dowager is So Wicked By putting on a crosstalk performance,Xiangsheng, or crosstalk, is a traditional Chinese comedic performance, typically featuring two performers in a rapid-fire, witty dialogue. Yao Xi added plenty of oil and vinegar to the story, making sure Liao Bing got a proper moment in the spotlight before the Empress Dowager. She also felt that if Maiden Hanqiu had been a crosstalk actress in the 21st century, her skill as a straight manThe original term is 'penggen,' the…
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